Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Typing = Cool

I always feel super cool when I'm blogging or chatting with one of my buddies on instant messenger and my fingers are practically flying over the keyboard in their ultra-fantastic choreographed typing bonanza.  It's almost like my brain can't keep up with my fingers sometimes.  To be able to type so fast makes me feel like I've arrived; that I've officially reached computer awesomeness. 

I first aspired to this position when I used to watch my mom type on our computer and, to my little kid brain, she was typing up a storm about super important business.  Of course this was during a time when it would take me 10 minutes of searching the keyboard just to locate the "A" key and then once I found it, go on another epic journey for the "N" key until, after an average movie-lengths worth of complete non-action, I managed to spell my name.  I thought it would be so cool to be able to type like my mother and be able to crank out pages of text in seconds at a time.

After my arduous journey of learning how to type along with plenty of internet play time for practice, I discovered one of those mind-blowing secrets that shatters childhood notions of how things were.  I had the opportunity to work with my mom in the same office and I discovered she never actually learned how to type.  She's one of those people who looks at the keyboard and just has a good idea about where all the keys are and thus has managed to type at a decent speed.  In fact, she contracted me to do a job that required typing something up because I was a faster typist. 

Although somewhat surprised that she couldn't possibly be as quick as I remembered, (perhaps writing words in seconds instead of pages) I had arrived.  I realized that I had surpassed my childhood expectations of how cool I would look typing too fast for the naked eye to see.  The only way it could possibly get any cooler is if I could type really fast while not even looking at the computer screen to see my words.  Oh wait, I can.  The only problem is, there are very few occasions when this skill is necessary so no one gets to see that awesome talent.  Either that, I just look like a total douche who's just showing off.  I practice this skill in front of John when I want to reassert my superior skills because he's one of those "look at the keyboard" types.  He doesn't seem terribly impressed, but I know he's just jealous. 

I can type fast.  That makes me cool.  It's proven my science.

My keyboard where I type fast which makes me cool as proven by science


1 comment:

boob said...

your awesonmness cmes from me becaulese ilm awsome the lmkost ilcan wipe at a suiper fast passce ur welcum bob