Friday, May 27, 2011

I'm a female?!??

Lately I've been finding that my emotional response to fictional and/ or televised material to be significantly heightened.  Usually my sadness response was limited to well crafted movies and that scene in Scrubs where Dr. Cox thinks he's at his sons birthday party but he's really at his best friends funeral (swear to God, saddest moment on television I've ever seen), but even in those situations, I only ever THOUGHT about crying, I'd never actually shed any tears.  However, recently there have been MANY sad things on TV and I've even had a full blown meltdown during a movie.  I think I've figured out why. 

I am now in a relationship.  I think since I've started dating John, I have been put in the role of girlfriend and my body suddenly realized "OMG!  I'm a female!  I should act like one!".  It's like my hormones were laying dormant pretending that they didn't exist and giving me a false sense of sanity.  But then they were called upon to fulfill their destiny of turning me into an emotionally compromised crazy person.  Now I'm the kind of person who starts balling in the middle of "The Last Unicorn" because the main character is having identity issues.  And just the other day, I had to stop watching a show about this girl who hordes animals because it was so sad it made me want to kill myself. I swear my feminine hormones are just throwing a wild party and laughing at me while I cry at every sad story on TV. 

I wish I had some kind of master control switch that could turn them off at will.  I'm sensing a great business opportunity here.  Someone should invent this.  Females and boyfriends everywhere will thank you and forever be in your debt. 

Me being innocent and carefree before I realized I'm insane


No comments: